family guy quotes.
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(Source: familyguyfun)

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Peter: I'll handle it, Lois. I read a book about this sort of thing once.
Brian: Are you sure it was a book? Are you sure it wasn't nothing?
Peter: Oh yeah.
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(Source: familyguy-gifs)

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Dear McGyver: Enclosed is a paper clip, a rubber band, and a drinking straw. Please save our dog.
Peter Griffin
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(Source: familyguy-gifs)

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Lois: Peter! You're bribing your daughter with a car?
Peter: Ah, c'mon, Lois, isn't 'bribe' just another word for 'love'?
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hogwarts-hipsters:

Alan Rickman’s Answering Machine

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I don’t want your Mom to worry alright? When she worries she starts saying things like ‘I told you so’ or ‘Stop doing that I’m asleep’.